There are different kinds of pain. I used to think of pain
and broken-heartedness as a result of being jilted. Being jilted is sad, but,
at the same time, being jilted is probably resulting from idolatry. If God
isn’t the most important thing in our life, we are setting ourselves up for a heart
break.
But I have to wonder if that is what the Bible is talking
about, when it talks about Jesus healing the broken-hearted, is a different
kind of pain. Maybe we are using the same word to describe two entirely
different things.
In the Therapeutic Movement, there is a focus on healing the
person from their ‘pain’. Pop psychology uses ‘man as the standard’ for
measuring things. There is no teaching on humility, neither is there teaching
on a greater Being that we have to submit to. So, if a person is not getting
what they want in life, they experience disappointment, then the resulting
‘pain’ from the disappointment. Pain is the result of worshiping idols that
isn’t being fulfilled.
But what about other types of pain? Because of the damage
from the Therapeutic Movement, which puts man at the center of the problem as
well as the answer, the word ‘pain’ has gotten a bad reputation. It sounds
selfish. And it can be. But, there are other kinds of pain, as well as other
reasons for pain.
Serious pain will be a part of life for women who have been
raped or were/are victims of sexual abuse. Rape is a serious thing and has
detrimental consequences. A rape victim cannot just shake the experience off
and go on with life. People need to know that when they encounter a rape
victim, there is going to be a lot of work in helping the victim. There is
hope, but it is not as easy as telling the person it will be ok.
First of all, women or little girls who are raped will not
be able to tell anyone. One reason is because there is so much shame involved
in it. The girl has been violated. Her dignity was stolen from her. She will
feel ugly, dirty, and full of shame. A good counselor will have to listen to
her, if she is willing to talk. The worst thing a counselor could do is to tell
the girl that it really didn’t happen, or that if she didn’t do such and such,
she wouldn’t have been raped. Another reason rape victims will not talk about
it, is because the rapist has threatened her, should she tell anyone. He might
tell her that nobody will believe her, or he might say that if she tells, he
will come and steal her puppy.
You have to try to imagine what it is like for a person to
go through rape. It is very difficult. She will experience a lot of pain. She
will feel betrayed. She will wonder why God allowed this to happen to her.
So, if a person has trusted you enough to confide in you,
please listen to her. She probably is telling you the truth. Please don’t
betray her confidence by telling her it is not a big deal, or that it didn’t
really happen. If she doesn’t get help from someone she can trust, she won’t
get any help at all.
